Do you know your shit? (part 1)
It’s unbelievable… over 31% of the typical mini-van driving, TiVo watching, Lucky Jean’s wearing, Prozac popping, spray-on-tan sporting American hasn’t taken a crap in the last 3 days! This is the same segment of the worlds population that insists that it is “civilized” because they have a functional public sewage system. But in the same regard, their personal sewage systems (digestive tracts) are backed up with putrid, foul and festering feces. If only they were as concerned with the “Colon Compost Collection” leaking through their gut wall into their blood stream and wreaking havoc on their immune system, causing such avoidable diseases as arthritis – as they are with catching a glimpse of Janet Jackson’s nipple during Super Bowl XXXVIII.
It’s all about the poop!
If you are kept up at night with a strange ‘gut feeling’ (forgive the pun). that you are suffering needlessly from a plethora of irritating, yet manageable – but nasty little chronic conditions such as:
-Poor Energy, Fatigue
-Excessive Farting or Burping
-Paunch Belly “Bloated Gut”
-Constipation… this list can go on for days!
You are very likely suffering from toxic overload due to severely Dysfunctional Digestion!
Prior to our days of Processed Foods, Proctologists and Prilosec – ancient physicians would diagnose the onset of disease by the analysis of physical and emotional symptoms, along with the analysis of our urine and feces. They would smell, touch and TASTE their patients poop in order to make a correct diagnosis as to the infestation of parasites, presentation of blood or mucus and as means for determining any internal imbalance.
Today, your doctor may ask you for a stool sample on rare occasion, but for the most part patients and practitioners have lost touch with the essential art of fecal examination as a means for maintaining good health and the diagnosis of disease. If you are obsessed as I am with maintaining superior health, strength and vitality well into your middle and old age – then you NEED to read and absorb this article and proceed with the practice of poop screening on a daily basis… if you are even going on a daily basis. We’ll discuss constipation in another article.
Know your shit!
Paul Chek created the diagram below to help his patients understand what to look for in the bowl after an “excretion episode”. Study the pictures and perhaps you’ll notice a character that looks like the creature that stares back at you from the throne. Below the diagram I give a brief description of each poop-animation, the cause for his existence and a few tips on how to defend yourself against him.
Poopie Line Up (from left to right)
The image above is from Paul Chek’s – How To Eat Move and Be Healthy
Sinker n’ Stinker – This guy is named as he behaves. He is like a smelly piece of black coal that sinks to the bottom of the bowl after an arduous attempt to squeeze him out with tremendous force. His appearance is due to an over exposure to toxins such as processed foods, environmental toxins and medical drugs.
The Swimmer – This guy is light in color and floats. He is a pain to flush. His appearance is due to a high content of undigested fat.
Bodybuilder – This dude is JACKED! He is typically big and round. He makes you strain to get him out of ya. If you pop a blood vessel in your eye ball when you poop, you’ve probably met this guy. His appearance is due to eating too many protein bars and shakes.
Pellet Man – Looks like rabbit poop. His appearance is due to altered states between peristalsis and dehydration.
Diarrhea – “If you’re sliding into first, and you feel something burst… “, this guy needs no introduction. His appearance is due to your crappy diet and your body’s attempt to purge you of it.
The Flasher – If you can identify what you’ve eaten by looking at your poop, you are being flashed! Undigested food particles making an appearance in your bowl is a sure sign that this guy has crashed your party. His appearance is due to food intolerance and an inflamed gut wall.
The Poopie Policeman - This guy is “The Shit”! He is what all of our poopies strive to look like. He is Well Shaped (with a consistent contour), Passes Easily, Light Brown In Color, Smells Earthy – not foul, yet he floats… but not too much. Mmmm.
In part 2 of this series I will discuss “Leaky Gut Syndrome” and why there may be poop in your blood. Also, more common causes of Dysfunctional Digestion and in part 3 I answer the question “Oh, my God Elliott… what the hell do I do about this?!” (this will be complete with an extensive resource section and recommend reading)
About Elliott Hulse
Elliott Hulse CSCS has successfully integrated strength training, nutrition, and lifestyle in order to maximize EVERY facet of his clients’ physical and human potential into a single program, which he has trademarked “The Primal Edge.”
For ten years, Elliott has dedicated his life to excellence in the fields of sports science and holistic health. He is certified by the most notable institutions in the fitness industry including the National Strength and Conditioning Association (CSCS) and the C.H.E.K Institute (EC, HLC).
As the author of the groundbreaking e-book Unleash Your Primal Edge, Elliott has utterly defied conventional methodologies with regard to human performance and fitness. It’s Elliott’s firm conviction that latent within every human being lie the seeds of extraordinary health, fitness, happiness, and longing for a return to our natural and primordial lifestyles that hold the keys to our “Primal Edge.”
Get two free reports, How to Flatten Your Abs Forever and Maximum Fitness Results by visiting http://www.primal-edge.com.