Fortify Your Blood Tribe Lock

I recently attended the wedding of a good friend of mine.  Like most typical weddings there was angelic-type music, flowers and pedals scattered about and over 100 people dressed in the finest clothes they could afford were in attendance.  Like I said, it was beautiful… and typical.

If we are to continue down the typical path, how would we find this newlywed couple in 2, 5, 10 or perhaps even 50 years from now?

Well, most marriages typically don’t last.

Here is how I see the story developing… Two super sexy singles lock eyes at a upscale restaurant during “Happy Hour” on a warm and sunny Friday in April.  She is wearing makeup that costs more than most people’s grocery shopping for a month, He hasn’t been laid in months.

He approaches Her and offers to buy Her a low quality alcoholic beverage mixed with a sort of syrup substance named after a Caribbean Island, that costs about $9.  She accepts the drink under the assumption that she is to proceed with smiles and giggles for the next 10 minutes, or until one party reveals their dark and dirty past a little too soon.

All goes smoothly and She accepts His invitation to His home (an apartment apparently inhabited by a man, but decorated with feminine amenity in mind) to have “coffee” or sex.

They are in love.

For 6 months they meet each other after working at their middle management jobs for an insurance agency and Target, until he presents her with a ginormous diamond ring that he’ll be paying off for the next 17 years.

They’ll be married come February.

The wedding is, of course, in a church… although neither have attended service since receiving Confirmation in the 7th grade.  She mistakenly calls the priest ‘Mister’.

Tens of thousand are spent to ensure a matching theme between the bridesmaid’s red adornments and the blood dripping from the dead dude on the cross above at the alter.  It is beautiful.

Grandparents in wheelchairs, alcoholic uncles and seductively dressed aunties hoping to find love that will last a lifetime, again, are in attendance.  Gifts of dinner plates, picture frames and vacuum cleaners are presented.

Ahh, the elements of a perfect union.

If you’re anything like the majority of adults living in the US, this setting and situation sounds familiar… and so will its conclusion.

1 year post wedding, She changes her mind about their agreement not having children (so they can “travel”) and realizes that at age 39 she can practically smell her eggs rotting.  The stench is gut wrenching and her guilt for not fulfilling her maternal instinct is devastatingly strong.  She NEEDS children now!  He’s getting ready for their trip to Amsterdam (and banging his best friend’s little sister).

She poses Him with an ultimatum… Children or Divorce.  He has no choice, “this bitch is losing her mind!”, he tells friends.

4 years later She has a daughter (who will repeat her choices and life cycle) out of wedlock with another stranger, and He is preparing for a long life of “freedom” (aka Loneliness).

The Importance Of A Strong Blood Tribe

As far as we have come we are the still the same.  We may have more conveniences and choices than ever before but our deepest human needs and authentic desires have remained unchanged for tens of thousands of years.

According the Maslow in his human Hierarchy Of Needs model, the most basic of human needs beyond safety and security is that of Tribal Association.  We need to belong.  A strong Blood Tribe is the foundation for association as well as evolution and expression (having or raising children).  Creative expression is also a result of the safety afforded by being a member of a strong Blood Tribe.

Your Blood Tribe also affords us safety and protection.  Unlike the other “beasts of the land” that have eyes on the sides of their heads for 360 degree vision,  primates were the first to have eyes in the front of their heads which allowed us to focus and concentrate on single objects but also limited our vision to a narrow scope.  As a result of our limited vision, primates had to “band together” or create tribes.  As is often observed today with monkeys in the wild, they sit in circles with their backs to each other in order that each monkey could focus on one area in the 360 degree land scape offering surveillance and protection to the rest of the tribe.

This “banding together” has the tendency to forge trust and stronger relationships within the tribe.  Each member places the entire tribe in the best interest of their heart.

As humans, we have retained this need for association self expression and protection.

The Importance of Commitment in a One on One Union

The foundation value in a Blood Tribe is commitment.  If there is a lack of trust or commitment from any one of the members that is meant to “have our back” the entire infrastructure of the family is in jeopardy.

In nature the male and female counterparts are equal halves to all of God’s creations.  Basically it takes both male and female qualities to merge in order that life can expand.  For example, for a tree to come into existence (and continue to reproduce in its own right) a seed (male) must be inserted into the soil (female).  To continue… for electrical charges to exist there must be a positive (male) and a negative (female) charge; the computer you are reading this on is nothing more than a series of switches moving from on (male) or off (female).  And of course for any animal to procreate there must be a male and female participating.

The vast difference between human beings and the other beasts of the land is that humans have the capacity and great primal desire for mental, emotional and spiritual evolution.  So, where animals pair up to simply make baby animals, humans pair up to physically procreate but to continue in the evolving union that allows for the birth of higher qualities in character, wisdom and understanding.

“Elliott, what the heck are you talking about?” – Because we are so much more than mere flesh and bones, we have the capacity to create or harness unseen gifts and power!  For example, we have discovered how to harness the power of electricity, which is completely intangible (it’s like some magic energy juice that we figured out how to use).  Like I mentioned before, electricity is a by product of the intermingling of positive and negative charges.  Another great example is the use of magnets… positive and negative charges that create a VERY powerful intangible force, magnetism!

When human beings overcome the limitations of our flesh and ego, we are afforded the capacity to strengthen the “electricity and magnetism” between the positive (man) and negative (woman) forces between us.  In the same fashion that electricity has the power to light an entire city and bring day into the night realm, the intangible forces between man and woman have the power to create and build a SUPER STRONG BLOOD TRIBE that has the capacity to not only bring light to a single city but to shed its light on the world!

The strength of the Blood Tribe may be responsible for some of the most powerful forces in the universe.  Since human beings possess many of the qualities present in our Creator (“made in the likeness and image”) and since God is both male and female it is very clear that in order to fulfill our greatest capacities both male and female must be present to first bring forth (children for example) and cultivate creative strength.

Unity Within (beyond the flesh)

This may be considered moving off track for a moment, but bear with me.  Many of the greatest thinkers, artists and contributors to ever live may have lived in separation from the opposite physical sex and did not procreate to form a Blood Tribe.  But if you study their lives, they were often times so powerful that moving beyond the proliferation of flesh bodies, they created spiritual bodies with their hearts and minds.

For example, Michelangelo’s physical act of painting the Sistine Chapel (action = male) was balanced with the rest, meditation and contemplation time (rest = female) that he is well known for valuing.

I may be delving a bit deep here but I wanted to make the point that we, like God, can also harbor the qualities of both male and female in order to create in absence of the opposite physical sex… although this takes a highly evolved person to accomplish.

Prerequisites For A Strong Blood Tribe Lock

It is often said that “two halves make a whole”, but as it relates to a strong Blood Tribe union… two wholes are needed to create a whole.

What I mean is that both partners must have an evolved enough “Tribe of One” that it will allow for the creation of a strong “Blood Tribe”.

For example, if the seed that is planted in the soil is still immature, no matter how fertile the soil is a tree will never grow.  Likewise, if the soil that a mature seed is planted in is not fertile then a tree will never grow.

Each person must first be whole.

Each person must also harbor the same VALUES as the other.  They may be whole, but if they ignore incompatibilities (because they are “in love”), the union will not work.  In Florida, palm trees grow in the sand… the values of the palm tree, hot weather, hurricanes and sand provide the right conditions for the tree to grow, the values match.  An oak tree will NOT grow in the sand.

If you value modesty yet you marry a woman who likes to dress provocatively (hey, that’s what caught your eye!), no matter how much you think you love her there will always be resentment which will lead to a weak “Tribe Lock”.

I am not saying that you can’t work these things out, but I’d invite you to ensure enough of the core values match up front before making a commitment.

Clarity, Commitment & Discipline

Surly you’ve heard me site my CCD model for achievement.  Well, with regards to choosing a Blood Mate and creating your Blood Tribe the same parameters apply.  You must first be VERY clear about who you are and what your values are before getting married.  When you have made a conscious choice (not out of “love”, which is a fickle emotion) to partner with a person you must do everything in your power to serve this person and retain a strong “lock” for insurance of a strong Blood Tribe.

Finally, you must discipline yourself to “re marry” your wife / husband every day.  By this I mean that you recommit to them in your words and actions, just like you originally did on the day of marriage.  Just because Aunt Marcella is not holding your hands and reciting The Lords Prayer over your marriage, doesn’t mean your now free to loosen the ties of your agreement.

Just like you are “born again” everyday, so is your marriage.  Re-commit every day!

Marriage is IRRELEVANT!

Over 50% of marriages fail.  Is this because marriage is an antiquated institute?  Yes.

Marriage is antiquated and irrelevant today because the values associated with marriage have become irrelevant to our society.

Today, it is no longer relevant to have HONESTY, as is evident by many of the recent developments in the business and financial world.

It is no longer relevant to have LOYALTY, as is evident with all of “open marriages” and infidelity that we observe in our modern world.

It is no longer relevant to develop the TENACITY associated with overcoming challenges and achievement, as is evident in our “everyone’s a winner” society where every child is entitled to a trophy weather they worked hard to win or were lazy and fat, so lost.

It is no longer relevant to have CLARITY, COMMITMENT and especially DISCIPLINE as is evident in, well, everything!

I Am Not Trying To Save The World

Look, I am not some religious zealot claiming that the end of the world is near and everyone needs to get married and have children to stop Armageddon from erupting.  I am NOT trying to save the world.  The world is not meant for saving, just evolving.  And as a believer in Christ, I am also a believer in Darwin.  Survival of the fittest, evolution, is inevitable.  Some versions of the human species are meant to evolve, grow and proliferate… while others will become extinct due to an inability to adapt.

Although I will not stand in the way of evolution, I will share a message that may strengthen (or make fit) those who are looking to evolve.

If my message resonates with you, walk with me.  If not, that’s fine too.

Our physical bodies may be unchanged for the past 10,000 years.  No matter what you believe, it is clear that man is physically the same today as he was in prehistoric times.  But we are changing, rapidly!

We have harnessed the “magic” to fly in the air and to instantly communicate across the globe… but our primal needs are the same.

We need each other.

We need tribal association.

We need creative expression.

We need to evolve.

The strength of The Blood Tribe allows us to evolve.

A STRONG marriage creates a STRONG Blood Tribe.